oopps!!

I had planned to "blog" at least once a week and I think it has been 2 months since my last entry..BUT, I have been so tired from the Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia.... Besides, I am dealing with some other issues that I cannot go into that has left my mind as strong as wet dough...I pray that all had a safe Thanksgiving and will remember to keep CHRIST in CHRISTmas!!!!!! Keena

September.....What a month.....

Hey.... Yes, I know its been awhile since my last blog, but things have been crazy...On the 2nd, our beloved pet died from lung cancer. On the 11th, I got sick. I ended up in the hospital due to continuous vomitting...Drs said I had a severe kidney infection, which I never had symptons of until then. Two days later my mother got ill and 3 days after her my hubby was ill. We call EMS for him becasue he started vomitting and could not stop. The dr sent him home, but 2 hours later his fever spiked to 105.1, so we called EMS again. He could not walk. He ended up in the hospital for 2 days. Since hospital stays, we both(hubby and I) have had sinus infections. Hubby will have to have surgery due to the fact he has cysts in his nasal cavitites. So to say the least, I AM TIRED!!!!! and my house is a mess!!!! On a positive note, my husband won a free dinner to Five Guys which was good. Plus he has received free tickets to the NBA preseason game here in Charleston. I am going to see my 1st NBA game...AND, we will be in the Papa John's VIP booth... Hopefully, things will settle down fast.... oh, by the way......I have started Weight Watchers and lost 4.8lbs the 1st week.....Cheerleaders and encouragers welcome....hahaha

Gone But Not Forgotten

It breaks my heart to write today. Our special "Senior puppy" is no longer with us. Dove left us last week. About two weeks prior, she started acting different. Mom took her to the vet and to our surprise, the vet told us Dove had LUNG CANCER. You can just imagine our shock to this news.. She had always been a playful and healthy dog. After that news was confirmed by a "doggie specialist"(didn't realize they existed), mom and I decided to put her down so that she did not begin to suffer. The vet did tell us that there were no treatments. Well, I had a real problem putting her down..By the grace of GOD, Dove went on her own 2 hours before the vet was to come to the house to do that awful deed.

Dove was my "baby". A friend and I adopted her at 8 weeks old. She was 12 and 1/2 years old when she died. My heart is shattered like glass hitting a cement floor. For 9 years, she was by my side. I took her with me whenever I could. and YES, she slept in the bed with me until I got married. Now I did allow Mom to keep Dove when I got married because I thought it was best for Dove. She had a big back yard and constant company. If you are an animal person, you know that there is "ONE" special pet over all others. Dove was that pet. She was gentle, playful, she like to tease you, and she gave love unconditionally. Every visit to the vet's, he would comment that she was a happy dog. She knew she was loved. I believe that is why she lived so long with the cancer(dr. said he was shocked that she lived as long as she did with the cancer as advanced as it was). I could go on and on about how special she was and how every one loved her, but I will close this blog with this. I am grateful that God took her in her own home and that she died in my arms. Dove I love you. You may be gone in body but you are alive in my heart.....................

Please put the toliet seat DOWN!!!!

Honestly ladies, this has never bothered me.....Normally my husband does put it down, but when he forgets, it's no big deal. Now, what does bother me is when he________I'll let you fill in the blank......Whatever it is, IT drives us nuts. Don't you agree? HOWEVER, when I focus on those things, it makes me a little sad. This is not what I signed up for...This is not how it is portrayed in movies or in books, but this is real life...So I have made a decision, rather a commitment to think on those things that are positive. Hhhmmm, I think someone has suggested that before.........like uummm, Paul in his writings. Sooo, when my hubby does something "manly", I remember all that he does for me. For ex. right now as I am writing this, he is making dinner. Also, he helps me do laundry, clean the kitchen, he gives me money to spend on me. etc. He is a good guy. So my question is this ladies, When did having a good marriage not be enough? Instead of focusing on what we don't have or what he doesn't do, we ladies , need to focus on the good AND let HIM know it. I love my husband and appreciate him so much.. NO, he is not perfect and YES, he does things to annoy me, but uh, I guess I do the same to him...Let's make a choice to uplift our husbands, to respect them and talk good to them and about him to others. As much as I get annoyed with him I am more annoyed with women who bash and talk crudely to their husbands and about their husbands to others. Women, it is our job to encourage, respect, LOVE(do we need to be reminded of the Biblical definition of LOVE), and build up our husbands.... Let's not wait another moment....Let's begin today!!!!!!!!!!

When the Rubber Meets the Road

My last post I shared that God had given me peace.... Well now, it is being tested.. Why is it when God speaks to you, He always gives you a test??!!! LOL.. I guess it means that He thinks you can pass....

My husband has lost his job and my supervisor is trying to push me out of my job before my disability gets approved...So our finances are looking poorly right now....Our condo has not sold so now the bank is calling....

My faith is being tested....Will I keep my peace and trust in God

or will I allow my self to be distracted by the circumstances that

surround me....If I have any thing to do with it, I will keep my

eyes on Christ...He has promised that He will never leave me or

forsake me and that His peace is mine.... It will be hard but I

must do those things to keep my focus upward

Take care and until next time....Keep the faith

Peace.....at last

I have been wanting to share this for some time but just could not get into written word..In my mind the words flow beautifully, but to put them on paper(on in this case "on screen") seems like an enormous task but here goes................. For the last six years I have been struggling with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. At times, the fatigue has been so overwhelming where I would sleep for 2 to 3 days just so I can function again. Since that diagnosis, my body has begun to fall about. I will not go into all that I deal with on a daily basis. During these past six years, depression and despair have been my companions. Loneliness was always at hand. Many nights I lay awake asking God to rid me of this disease, to heal me and make me whole. I slowly began to lose my life. I had to resign my position at the church. That hurt so deeply, but I just could not keep up with it. Then I began to miss church altogether. I needed rest on the weekends just to make it to work during the week. Even with the rest on weekends, I missed a lot of work. Only by God's favor and grace I still have a job. As my life began to spiral downwards, so did my faith. Was God punishing me for something? Had I committed some unforgivable sin? Why did He not heal me? Did I not have enough faith or belief? Did I minister in pride? Did I teach wrong to the students? All these questions filled my heart. I fought hard to keep from drowning. My spirit had been defeated. Peace had escaped me. Yet, I kept praying and crying out to God. There was no one but me and God. THEN.............. I heard a (believe it or not) a southern gospel song that brought tears to my eyes. The Holy Spirit reminded me about Lazarus. As I reread that familiar story, God spoke to me. First, He loves me. Even though I am sick, He loves me. Secondly, Jesus delayed going to His friend. It was nothing Lazarus did or did not do. It was God's choice NOT to heal. Why? To show Lazarus and his family a greater thing. I have no bearing on when or if God heals me. It is HIS choice. It is not by my sin or lack of faith, but GOD wants to show me a greater thing.. PRAISE GOD!!!! However, God also spoke to me that I must see death. Now I don't sense it is an actual death like Lazarus, but more death to world, self, pride, maybe even material stuff. I'm not sure. But I do know He is in control and He has given me a peace beyond understanding. There are some steps that I need to take to draw myself closer to God, but I find it so hard to do. I sympathize with Paul when he said he did the things he ought not do and did not do the things he ought.. Our flesh is so strong, but our spirit must be stronger. Peace, Peace, Wonderful Peace.... I now have Peace with God, Peace in God and Peace from God..Nothing beats having HIS Peace. OH, what joy May God bless you and keep you in HIS perfect peace until meet again Keena

And yet another doctor

Well, today was another visit to another doctor...Looking for answers to this mysterious disease Chroniuc Fatigue Syndrome..The dr was nice but referred me to yet another dr....This dr believes that Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia is a sleep disorder that starts due to pinched nerves in the feet.... By giving me shots( I am assuming cortisone) in my feet that it will make me better....At this point I am willing to try anything...I have suffered with CFS for nearly 6 years and I am frustrated, but I will not give up...This may be the doc that God uses to heal me....Then again, God may not use anyone at all( that is another blog for another day) Until next time Take care and God bless

I'm Back

Wow ....It has been over a year since my last blog....What can I say except that I have neglected blogging for several reason that I will not go into.....I have so much that I'd like to share...Do I blog one long entry or do I break it up into several shorter entries...The reason why I am coming back to blogging is my good freind Paula... She has started blogging recently which peaked my interest again in the written word...I do wonder though it any person will actually read what I write.... I would love to receive comments on my writings...

Well, take care and I will blog later tonight with all my thoughts and ramblings